Enneagram Personality Traps 👹 Why is Everything So Horrible? 😭 The Self-Fulfilling Prophecy of Type🔥 (INTRO)
Written by Larissa in March 2023
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What is a “belief”?
Beliefs are things we assume to be true - about ourselves, others, the world, what's possible and not possible, etc. But they can be only partially true, false or straight up lies.
Beliefs can be ingrained into us by our family in our early years, teachers, peers, TV/media, and we just accept them as fact. We have no reason to question them, or if we do, we might get scolded or made to feel stupid. Often they're to keep us safe or with the intention of helping - and they may serve this purpose when we're younger, but may not as adults. They work in reverse, too. Maybe you hate your family so you believe the opposite of whatever they tell you - also creating a belief. (ex: “Rich people are terrible.” You decide to become rich, because fuck those tv-dinner eating, indolent assholes you unfortunately share DNA with.)
Beliefs can also be created by significant emotional events - positive and negative. They can be created by culture, family income level, the neighborhood you grew up in, literally everything.
What is a “limiting belief”?
Limiting beliefs are beliefs that we hold onto that keep us stuck or held back from our dreams, what we want, our next level. Because they were created in our youth, they become our comfort zone - even if they're uncomfortable. They tell us that we don't get to have what we want, we don't get to be who we want, we don't get to do what we want.
Limiting beliefs can be especially intense when linked to a significant emotional event, trauma or our IDENTITY (which can be our personality type).
The way our unconscious and subconscious mind works is that it will look to reinforce what we believe. So if we believe something limiting, toxic or detrimental to us, our mind will work to create these situations. This is why we can play out trauma patterns over and over. It's not conscious, obviously. We're not intentionally trying to harm ourselves.
Traumas and past experiences can be healed or treated. However, when the belief originates at the personality - or IDENTITY - level it feels EXTRA dangerous and high stakes.
The personality type is how we EXPRESS and COPE with our beliefs, shadow, experiences, programming, trauma.
It also dictates the kinds of beliefs we may take on or how we can interpret specific situations that other types interpret differently.
What is a “personality trap”?
The "personality trap" is a belief so strong that it's on the identity level. It feels like life or death. Some of it may be conscious, but most of it will likely be completely unconscious (unless you've been doing self-work for a while).
This "trap" (belief) generates the coping strategy that your Enneagram type employs to its own detriment. This strategy is designed to get you what you want, but it's actually what prevents you from having, being or doing what you want.
*insert scream emoji*
*rewind*
say what?
These beliefs, strategies (and resulting behaviors) attract and repel scenarios that reinforce the belief and identity structure. So this can happen around trauma and generic beliefs, but it can also work to reinforce the ego structure of your personality type. Especially in low health.
Usually if we get to the “low health” point of our personality, it’s because life isn’t working out how we wanted or we feel triggered a lot. And each type has baked in triggers regardless of past traumas or experiences. When we're in that triggered state, we play out our Enneagram patterns on autopilot.
These patterns reinforce themselves - "positively" and "negatively". When the personality becomes unhealthy, it can double down on the behaviours, pushing itself even further away from what it wants, in pursuit of what it wants, without realizing that's what it's doing.
By overdoing the predominant fear or belief of the type, you make it unattainable.
Each Enneagram Type's fear stems from the subconscious belief that if they are NOT this way (chasing after their personality's "passion") that their very existence is in jeopardy.
Their personality trap - or it's lie - feels like TRUTH because the Ego believes it needs to be there to be safe: "This is the only way I can safely exist."
Therefore the personality trap becomes its own self-fulfilling prophecy if it's not brought into conscious awareness, accepted, integrated and managed.
The absolute basics:
1’s overdo perfection (which prevents them from feeling perfect)
2’s overdo nurturing (which prevents them from feeling nurtured/loved)
3’s overdo value (which prevents them from feeling valued/valuable)
4’s overdo depth/separateness (which prevents them from feeling deep or separate)
5’s overdo objectivity/specialization/competency (which prevents them from feeling objective/specialized/competent enough)
6’s overdo security (which prevents them from feeling secure)
7’s overdo freedom (which prevents them from feeling free)
8’s overdo power (which prevents them from feeling powerful)
9’s overdo inner peace and harmony (which prevents them from feeling harmony)
Expanded:
1’s believe they have to be correct, perfect, good and pure in order to exist. Therefore the opposite is “not me” which creates a repulsion or fear. And that fear of imperfection causes them to over-focus on imperfections, badness and wrongness in themselves and others (via nitpicking and criticism), which prevents them from ever feeling or being good enough, pure enough, right enough or perfect enough.
2’s believe they have to be nurturing, giving, others-focused and needed by others in order to exist. Therefore the opposite is “not me” which creates a repulsion or fear. Their fear of being unloved, unwanted, unneeded (or seen as neglectful) causes them to overdo nurturing and helping (to the point of meddling and intruding) in order to become indispensable. This causes others to push them away or take advantage of them, and prevents the 2 from feeling truly loved, wanted or needed.
3’s believe they have to be admired, valuable, desirable and even superior in order to exist. Therefore the opposite is “not me” which creates a repulsion or fear. 3’s fear of being worthless or having no value, causes them to overdo value by competing, comparing, manipulating, deceiving, and adapting to others’ ideals. Which inevitably leads them to feeling worthless to themselves.
4’s believe they have to be separate, misunderstood, deep, tragically different and unique in order to exist. Therefore the opposite is “not me” which creates a repulsion or fear. 4’s fear of being shallow, functional, relatable or common causes them to overdo self-sabotage, dissatisfaction, alienation, hostility and backing themselves into a corner, which inevitably causes them to have to settle for an ordinary, shallow, sub-par and one-note existence.
5’s believe they have to be hermetic, withdrawn, monomaniacal, entirely self-sufficient and a tiny head sac autocrat in the mental realm in order to exist. Therefore the opposite is “not me” which creates a repulsion or fear. 5’s fear of being swept away by others irrationalities, needs, and emotions causes them to become overly abstracted, withdrawn, removed, objective competency machines, which results in them becoming impractical, disconnected from reality, incompetent and at the mercy of the hysterical masses and world that they fear.
6’s believe they have to be on the same page with others in their “tribe,” contributing, vigilant and learned in order to exist. 6’s self-doubt and fear of loss of security keeps them outsourcing their inner knowing to external guidance systems and living in a state of anxiety (the fear of fear). This orientation to the grid, external factors and threats is what prevents them from ever feeling truly safe or secure.
7’s believe they have to be dazzled and dazzling, roaming around (mentally or literally), unencumbered and creating momentum in order to exist. 7’s fear of being trapped, stagnant, bored and unsatisfied causes them to constantly flee and seek possibilities, novelty and freedom. But this is what inevitably traps them when they run out of road and options, and it leads to the impossibility of satisfaction or true liberation.
8’s believe they have to be powerful, dominant, expansive and self-protective in order to exist. 8’s fear of being exploited or powerless causes them to exert control and power over others, which inevitably creates hostile situations in which others want to strip them of their power (because they’ve become the monster they fear).
9’s believe they have to be internally peaceful, calm and chill in order to exist. 9’s fear of conflict, loss of connection and disharmony with others (and self) causes them to self-erase and self-abandon. This ultimately causes conflict and loss of harmony because their unspoken needs are not being seen, met, understood or respected.
You'll have a pattern that fits in with the descriptions but you'll also have your own unique flavour of "traps" and beliefs. A dance or combat, or a combination of both, happening between your core and fixes, wings, instincts and lived experiences and beliefs that you were raised with or absorbed as a young person.
You may find that your core type's patterns are tougher to see than your fixes or wings, and that's because it's so ingrained in your psyche and unconscious that it's almost invisible.
Until it's not.
And that's when the aha! moments start happening and you can create mega changes in your life.
Each type's fear stems from the belief that if they are NOT this way, chasing after their personality's passion, unconsciously doing their pattern -- that their very existence is in jeopardy.
Their personality trap - or it's lie - feels like TRUTH. This is the only way to exist through the lens of the ego.
Therefore... the personality trap becomes its own self-fulfilling prophecy if it's not brought into conscious awareness, accepted, integrated and managed.
I’ll be posting further writings for each of the 9 types and their Personality Traps. If that interests you, subscribe to be notified (it’s free). I also just launched a membership which includes discounts, early access, bonus content, live calls and mini workshops for only $7/month (which helps me create all of this content that I share for free). If that interests you, please click here. You can also book a typing call with me here or here.